There is never enough time to do all the nothing you want
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on
If we should not eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge?
I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake
Dance, when you're broken open. Dance, if you've torn the bandage off. Dance in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance when you're perfectly free
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
