Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever
Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be
We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once
The art of knowing is knowing what to ignore
Love is a serious mental disease
Politicians are not born; they are excreted
Look closely. The beautiful may be small
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer