I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
Politicians are not born; they are excreted
If you can't make it good, at least make it look good
Others have seen what is and asked why. I have seen what could be and asked why not
If we are not ashamed to think it, we should not be ashamed to say it
Consider the feeling that rules your heart, for then you will understand what you are worth
Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
