The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
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Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book
zombies eat brains, you are safe
A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy
I'm not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too
Shortest horror story: Monday
You are my favorite distraction
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Actor, Comedian, Writer