There is never enough time to do all the nothing you want
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it
You could not handle me even if I came with instructions
I need a six month vacation, twice a year
Don’t fall in love. Fall off a bridge, it hurts less
I can calculate the motion of heavenly bodies but not the madness of people
Hell is empty and all the devils are here
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
