I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars
The face is the mirror of the mind, and eyes without speaking confess the secrets of the heart
Beauty when unadorned is adorned the most
I'm as single as a dollar and i'm not looking for a change
Resist much, obey little
Others have seen what is and asked why. I have seen what could be and asked why not
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
