I’m not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
Out of the crooked timber of humanity, no straight thing was ever made.
Courtesy costs nothing, but buys everything
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book
Take things always by their smooth handle
Always remember that you are unique. just like everyone else
I honor religion except when it gets into shedding blood
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
