I’m going to stand outside. So if anyone asks, I am outstanding
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken
Blushing is the most peculiar and most human of all expressions
The fly does not enter the mouth that is shut.
Nature makes penicillin; I just found it
You can make anything by writing
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer