I’m as single as a dollar and i’m not looking for a change
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
Justice will not be served until those who are unaffected are as outraged as those who are
Life is and will ever remain an equation incapable of solution, but it contains certain known factors
If we should not eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge?
There is nothing more ancient than the truth
He is an intelligent person who can translate his actions into good
Some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer