I’m as single as a dollar and i’m not looking for a change
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words
Money is something. you got to make in case you don't die
I can't imagine a man really enjoying a book and reading it only once
I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there
Can one desire too much of a good thing?
You may live to see man-made horrors beyond your comprehension
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
