I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
He who wishes to be obeyed must know how to command
My will is mine...I shall not make it soft for you
The friendship that can cease has never been real
zombies eat brains, you are safe
Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone
I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
