You wanna know who I’m in love with? Read the first word again
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever
What we know is a drop, what we don't know is an ocean
Everyone has his day, and some days last longer than others
I don't have bad handwriting, I'm just using my own font
The art of knowing is knowing what to ignore
Love is a serious mental disease
May be you should eat some makeup, so you can be pretty on the inside too
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
