Shortest horror story: Monday
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The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value
Set your heart on doing good. Do it over and over again and you will be filled with joy
You could not handle me even if I came with instructions
Cowards die many times before their deaths; the valiant never taste of death but once
He who is fond of delicious food, let him bear in mind that ultimately he is to be food for worms
Youth is not restored by the dyeing of your hair
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Actor, Comedian, Writer