The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
Both optimists and pessimists contribute to society. The optimist invents the aeroplane, the pessimist the parachute
It is in the character of very few men to honor without envy a friend who has prospered
People who boast about their I.Q. are losers
The way for a young man to rise is to improve himself in every way he can, never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him
Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but its gets boring. So I go back to being me
If you can't make it good, at least make it look good
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
