My room is not messy, It is an obstacle course designed to keep me fit
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
One who makes himself a worm cannot complain afterwards if people step on him
Begin now to be what you will be hereafter
I make it a rule never to smoke while I’m sleeping
Art may make a suit of clothes, but nature must produce a man
I'm not always annoying, sometimes I sleep too
happiness is... having friends with the same mental disorders as yours
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
