My goal this weekend is to move only enough so people know I am not dead
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
Always remember that you are unique. just like everyone else
Gravity explains the motions of the planets, but it cannot explain who sets the planets in motion
Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall
Let yourself be drawn by the stronger pull of that which you truly love
Respect is how to treat everyone, not just those you want to impress
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
