If we should not eat at night, why is there a light in the fridge?
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
While there's life, there's hope
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book
We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once
In heaven, all the interesting people are missing
Out of the crooked timber of humanity, no straight thing was ever made.
Ignorance, the root and stem of every evil
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
