I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there
Poverty is the parent of revolution and crime
The value of every person is found in what he is best at
The function of a citizen and a soldier are inseparable
I will speak daggers to her, but use none
I honor religion except when it gets into shedding blood
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
