How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he’s lost?
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
I turned my phone on airplane mode and threw it in the air. Worst transformer ever
We stopped looking for monsters under our bed when we realized that they were inside us
Doubt that the sun doth move, doubt truth to be a liar, but never doubt I love
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. And be kinder than is necessary
In individuals, insanity is rare; but in groups, parties, nations and epochs, it is the rule
The heart was made to be broken
The world's big and I want to have a good look at it before it gets dark
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer
