Good girls are found every corner of the earth. But unfortunately earth is round
The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits
Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak
How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he's lost?
You wanna know who I'm in love with? Read the first word again
Don't judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect
I want to sing like the birds sing, not worrying about who hears or what they think
Few friendships would survive if each one knew what his friend says of him behind his back
It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish
There are no limits to what you can achieve on your journey through life, except in your mind
Fellow, stand away from my diagram
I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you
Actor, Comedian
Comedian, Historian, Philosopher
Comedian, Writer
Actor, Comedian, Writer